(95% of straight men have had an orgasm, 86% of lesbians, 66% of straight women), I was suddenly extremely grateful that this was merely a reminder for me.
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Something so beautiful about the queer dating community (for millennials and older) is that we’ve passed education through friends and partners since how-to books, Netflix series and TikTok weren’t really at our disposal. Over the course of our relationship, she offered me all of the sex education I wish I had. I admit, before I met her, I thought my whole package was called a vagina and that masturbation was only for dudes (I was 23!). None of this surprises me, but I guess I can’t point to a particular time and place where I explicitly learned this.īefore I started dating my first girlfriend, I could’ve seriously benefited from Principles of Pleasure. Just because my vulva is wet doesn’t mean my brain is ready to go. Our genitals may not know all the warning, stop and go signals happening in the brain, which is more of a reason to understand and adhere to enthusiastic consent. Because our minds are the center of pleasure, our experience of it is totally independent of what is happening in or to our bodies. For example, did you know that the first true map of the clit wasn’t created until 2005? Yeah! Grey’s Anatomy omitted the clit because Freud thought clitoral orgasms were “immature.” Beyond anatomy, Principles of Pleasure clarified the difference between genital response and pleasure. Many of the questions posed to participants revolve around their first recollections of sex and pleasure, only to demonstrate that we collectively know absolutely nothing about our bodies and that sex is intimately tied to shame. Hill as they walk us through the details of anatomy, psychology and relationship dynamics. Narrated by the fun and perky Michelle Buteau, she takes us through all of the miseducation about vulva’s, squirting, sex toys, masturbation, arousal, attraction and really everything under the sheets. Split across three hour-long episodes, this docuseries covers the big three when it comes to pleasure: our bodies, our minds and our relationships. Netflix’s Principles of Pleasureattempts to answer this question, and also explains maybe why no one (other than straight cis men) knows about sex, sexual health and orgasms. What comes up for you when you read the word on the page? Hear it spoken with your own tongue? What images come to mind? Feelings? Sounds? We all know what the word “pleasure” is, but can you remember a time when you were taught about what exactly it means? Where did you first learn about pleasure? I don’t mean sex, I mean pleasure.
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